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Preface
Acknowledgments
Part ONE Conflict Components
Chapter 1 The Nature of Conflict
Interpersonal Conflict Depends on Interpersonal Communication
Family Relationships.....
Love Relationships.....
The Workplace.....
The Importance of Skill Development.....
Preventing Destructive Conflict.....
Conflict Defined.....
An Expressed Struggle.....
Interdependence.....
Perceived Incompatible Goals.....
Perceived Scarce Resources.....
Interference......
Understanding Destructive Conflict......
The Four Horsemen......
Stressful Drama Examples.....
Escalatory Spirals.....
Avoidance Spirals......
Your Opportunities.....
Summary......
Key Terms......
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Part ONE Conflict Components
Chapter 1 The Nature of Conflict
Interpersonal Conflict Depends on Interpersonal Communication
Family Relationships.....
Love Relationships.....
The Workplace.....
The Importance of Skill Development.....
Preventing Destructive Conflict.....
Conflict Defined.....
An Expressed Struggle.....
Interdependence.....
Perceived Incompatible Goals.....
Perceived Scarce Resources.....
Interference......
Understanding Destructive Conflict......
The Four Horsemen......
Stressful Drama Examples.....
Escalatory Spirals.....
Avoidance Spirals......
Your Opportunities.....
Summary......
Key Terms......
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Interpersonal Conflict Depends on Interpersonal Communication
Family Relationships.....
Love Relationships.....
The Workplace.....
The Importance of Skill Development.....
Preventing Destructive Conflict.....
Conflict Defined.....
An Expressed Struggle.....
Interdependence.....
Perceived Incompatible Goals.....
Perceived Scarce Resources.....
Interference......
Understanding Destructive Conflict......
The Four Horsemen......
Stressful Drama Examples.....
Escalatory Spirals.....
Avoidance Spirals......
Your Opportunities.....
Summary......
Key Terms......
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Family Relationships.....
Love Relationships.....
The Workplace.....
The Importance of Skill Development.....
Preventing Destructive Conflict.....
Conflict Defined.....
An Expressed Struggle.....
Interdependence.....
Perceived Incompatible Goals.....
Perceived Scarce Resources.....
Interference......
Understanding Destructive Conflict......
The Four Horsemen......
Stressful Drama Examples.....
Escalatory Spirals.....
Avoidance Spirals......
Your Opportunities.....
Summary......
Key Terms......
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
The Workplace.....
The Importance of Skill Development.....
Preventing Destructive Conflict.....
Conflict Defined.....
An Expressed Struggle.....
Interdependence.....
Perceived Incompatible Goals.....
Perceived Scarce Resources.....
Interference......
Understanding Destructive Conflict......
The Four Horsemen......
Stressful Drama Examples.....
Escalatory Spirals.....
Avoidance Spirals......
Your Opportunities.....
Summary......
Key Terms......
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Conflict Defined.....
An Expressed Struggle.....
Interdependence.....
Perceived Incompatible Goals.....
Perceived Scarce Resources.....
Interference......
Understanding Destructive Conflict......
The Four Horsemen......
Stressful Drama Examples.....
Escalatory Spirals.....
Avoidance Spirals......
Your Opportunities.....
Summary......
Key Terms......
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
An Expressed Struggle.....
Interdependence.....
Perceived Incompatible Goals.....
Perceived Scarce Resources.....
Interference......
Understanding Destructive Conflict......
The Four Horsemen......
Stressful Drama Examples.....
Escalatory Spirals.....
Avoidance Spirals......
Your Opportunities.....
Summary......
Key Terms......
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Perceived Incompatible Goals.....
Perceived Scarce Resources.....
Interference......
Understanding Destructive Conflict......
The Four Horsemen......
Stressful Drama Examples.....
Escalatory Spirals.....
Avoidance Spirals......
Your Opportunities.....
Summary......
Key Terms......
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Interference......
Understanding Destructive Conflict......
The Four Horsemen......
Stressful Drama Examples.....
Escalatory Spirals.....
Avoidance Spirals......
Your Opportunities.....
Summary......
Key Terms......
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
The Four Horsemen......
Stressful Drama Examples.....
Escalatory Spirals.....
Avoidance Spirals......
Your Opportunities.....
Summary......
Key Terms......
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Escalatory Spirals.....
Avoidance Spirals......
Your Opportunities.....
Summary......
Key Terms......
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Summary......
Key Terms......
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Review Questions.....
Chapter 2 Perspectives on Conflict
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Your Personal History.....
More Reflections on Your Specific History
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Your Worldview Affects How You Think and Feel About Conflict
Negative Views of Conflict.....
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Positive Views of Conflict.....
Insights from Metaphors.....
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Metaphors Reflecting Danger
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Metaphors Reflecting Opportunity
The Lens Model of Conflict.....
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
The Dangers of Single Focus.....
Identify The Filters on Your Lens.....
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Gender Filters.....
Cultural Filters.....
Summary......
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Chapter 3 Interests and Goals
Types of Goals: TRIP.....
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Topic Goals: What Do We Want?.....
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Relational Goals: Who Are We to Each Other?.....
Identity, or Face-Saving, Goals: Who Am I in This Interaction?.....
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Process Goals: What Communication Process Will Be Used?.....
The Overlapping Nature of TRIP Goals.....
Goals Change in Interaction.....
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Prospective Goals.....
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Transactive Goals.....
Retrospective Goals.....
Goal Clarity.....
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Clarify Your Goals
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Estimate the Other’s Goals.....
Collaborative Goals.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Chapter 4 Power: The Structure of Conflict
What Is Power?.....
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Orientations to Power.....
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Designated Power.....
Either/Or Power.....
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Both/And Power.....
Power Denial.....
A Relational Theory of Power.....
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Defining Interpersonal Power.....
Individual Power Currencies.....
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Resources Control
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Interpersonal Linkages
Communication Skills
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Expertise
Assessing Your Relational Power
Power Imbalances.....
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
High Power.....
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Low Power.....
Constructive Power Balancing.....
Techniques for Balancing Power.....
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Dialogue.....
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Restraint.....
Focus on Interdependence
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
The Power of Calm Persistence.....
Stay Actively Engaged.....
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Empowerment of Low-Power People by High-Power People.....
Metacommunication.....
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
What to Say When You Are Low Power.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Review Questions.....
Chapter 5 Styles
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
The Nature of Styles
Assessing Your Styles.....
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Will You Avoid or Engage?.....
Avoidance.....
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Avoidance and Culture.....
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
The Avoid/Criticize Loop.....
Avoiding.....
Dominating.....
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Destructive Domination.....
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Threats.....
Compromise.....
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Competition.....
Obliging.....
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Integrating.....
Cautions About Styles.....
Verbal Aggressiveness and Verbal Abuse
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Bullying.....
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Violence.....
Patterns of Violence.....
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Explanations for Violence.....
Interaction Dynamics.....
Flexibility Creates Constructive Conflict.....
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Being Stuck.....
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Are You Stuck?.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Review Questions.....
Part TWO Intervention
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Chapter 6 Emotions in Conflict
Introducing Emotion.....
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Misconceptions of Emotion in Conflict.....
Model of Emotions
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Finding Feelings.....
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Functions of Emotions.....
Functions of Negative Emotions.....
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Functions of Positive Emotions.....
Core Concerns: Organizing Positive Emotions
The Mid-Range: The Zone of Effectiveness.....
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
First Steps: Learn to Be a Warrior—of the Heart.....
Personal Responsibility for Emotional Transformation.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Review Questions.....
Chapter 7 Analyzing Your Conflicts
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Macro-Level Mapping.....
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Systems Theory.....
Complex Conflict Patterns....
Micro-Level Mapping.....
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Interaction Rules.....
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Microevents.....
Comprehensive Guides.....
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Conflict Assessment Guide.....
Difficult Conversations Guide.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Chapter 8 Interpersonal Negotiation
Negotiation in Everyday Life.....
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Negotiation Is One Path to Conflict Resolution.....
Negotiation and Culture.....
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Constructive Argumentation: Test Ideas, Not People.....
Approaches to Negotiation.....
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Competitive Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Assumptions.....
Communication Patterns.....
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Disadvantages.....
Integrative Negotiation.....
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Assumptions.....
Balancing Power
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Communication Patterns.....
Coaching for Integrative Negotiators: Putting It Into Practice
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Nonspecific Compensation
Disadvantages of Integrative Bargaining
Seven Elements of Principled Negotiation......
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
1. Attend to the relationship
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
2. Attend to all elements of communication
3. Focus on interests, not positions
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
4. Generate many options
5. Find legitimate criteria
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
6. Analyze the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA
7. Work with fair and realistic commitments
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
What makes implementing the Core Concerns So Difficult?
The Language of Integration.....
Competitive and Integrative Phases......
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Review Questions.....
Chapter 9 Third-Party Intervention
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
The Need for Third Parties.....
Advantages of Using Skilled Third Parties.....
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Informal Help.....
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Conditions for Helping.....
Cautions about Informal Intervention.....
Formal Intervention.....
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
The Intervention Continuum.....
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
When the Parties Decide.....
When an Outsider Decides.....
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Arbitration: An Expert Decides
Summary.....
Key Terms....
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Review Questions.....
Chapter 10 The Practice of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
by Gary W. Hawk, University of Montana
Forgiveness and Reconciliation in the Context of Interpersonal Conflict
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Some Definitions.....
What’s to Forgive?.....
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Some Misconceptions about Forgiveness.....
When There Is an Imbalance of Power.....
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
The Matter of Memory.....
Decision or Process?.....
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Emphasizing Process over Decision.....
Getting Stuck: Eddies in the River.....
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
The Personal and Interpersonal Dimensions of Forgiveness.....
Gestures.....
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
The Value and Limits of Apology.....
Switching the Point of View: Receiving Forgiveness and Forgiving Oneself
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Reconciliation: A Late Stage in the Journey.....
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Insights from History, Politics, and Literature.....
The Strand of Truth.....
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
The Strand of Forbearance.....
The Strand of Empathy.....
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence
The Tie that Binds: A Multicultural Example from Hawaii
Conclusion.....
Summary.....
Key Terms.....
Review Questions.....
References
Name Index
Subject Index
Commitment to the Relationship out of Awareness of Our Interdependence